THE ROLLER COASTER WORLD

"You can't stop the Beat!" Go Kate Go!

61 and nothing slows down. I cannot speak for the folks who decide to retire and just let the world go by as I might have been one of them had it not been for my kids, friends and husband. Now-the view changes every day.In my last blog, I reflected on my step-daughter’s beautiful wedding and John’s trip to Haiti. Ying/Yang. In this blog, it is Katrina’s success in Hairspray Houston, changing leaves in the mountains, the $10 million Medical Education Partners Initiative award that will take us back to Moshi, the new community initiatives with our CAB, the granddaughter and her determination to be independent, and the struggling recorder practice. Is that enough?

I am exhausted. These kinds of exhaustion are said to keep our brains working; yet, this morning I sat in the car wondering if it were Wednesday or Thursday, and if it were Wednesday, did I have a Ryan White meeting, or was it on Thursday, and if it were Thursday, did I miss the Ryan White meeting, did I have a lunch “date”, and how did I miss a fundraising meeting? Most of my family would agree that I have always had a bit of mix up in the brain area, especially around dates, times and events; but this one seemed significant.

Since I couldn’t resolve the issue at hand—Wednesday or Thursday, I spent a moment thinking about the past week. A crazed spontaneous flight to Houston and return back to NC in 36 hours included seeing Katrina in Hairspray and spending the night at a best friend of a best friend’s house. Katrina was awesome as Tracy, and her leading cast was as well. In the theatre, on the plane and in the car, I thought about what brought Katrina to Hairspray. There was a cell phone call from Katrina as I was walking to my car from work in 2003. “Mom, if I took a break from college, what would you think?” Well, I thought I would kill her, but managed to say, “what do you mean?” The conversation went from there. This spunky girl had managed over multiple auditions to get the attention of the producers of Hairspray, and they took a virtual unknown to Toronto to start what would be several years as Tracy. I remembered cleaning out her dorm room in a blizzard, meeting with her program director at school who had a much more glowing look at this girl than he had had even a year earlier. I remembered the tears, the bitterness, she had felt many times and the joy that she had and has every time she sings. It was quite a night for me to section her off for a few hours from the rest of the family and think about our life together and apart. It also made me feel incredibly nostalgic and not a little bit old.
Best Friend Austin and Katrina
A lucky exhausted bedraggled mom with equally exhausted Katrina and Austin after the show
My fav outfit-the Prison outfit, but sadly missing the prison keds tennis shoes.
So, thank heavens just a day after getting home, we dashed to the mountains and watched the leaves change right in front of our eyes. From no color to lots of color in 36 hours. Amazing. And nostalgic. Soon it will be the 12th anniversary of my mother’s death, and just past the 10th anniversary of my father’s. Both loved the mountains, and though mother never saw the completed house, she was thrilled that we were building a retreat that would give us quiet and peace.
The trusty maple tree below the cabin
A view from the cabin
Our great dream cabin
As we watched the leaves, we thought about the huge grant that was just awarded to KCMC, and that will take us back to Moshi for several months a year. As John toiled day after day writing, editing, re-writing, contacting key players all around the school and the world, and working diligently with KCMC leadership, he continued to say, “This is an incredible long shot”. When the grant was submitted, he looked at me and said, “That was the best that I could do.” The grant was funded, the work now begins. Will the grant be successful? What is the meaning of success in the impoverished world of Northern Tanzania? As I listen to the work that now goes on, the promises of support from our colleagues, and friends in the US and in Moshi, it is a bit awesome. And, I cannot wait to see friends and breathe in Tanzania as we walk out of the plane. And, to see Carol waiting when we come out of customs!
Colleagues who helped with the grant + our beloved Congressman David Price
Carol enjoying Arusha National Park
Perhaps the most difficult part of focusing again on Moshi, is watching my granddaughter grow and demand independence, and in watching our AIDS Community Advisory Board branch out into areas that we had not thought about doing before, and doing it well.
Miss Independence Lyri drives her car!
Jacquie works her magic.
Little Lyri wants to do everything herself. Soon enough, she will come to find that she will have to depend on others for something, and learn about working together. That is our experience, all of ours. As Tracy and Link say, “It takes two of us, it takes two.”

Hopefully, at the end of the day, I will be able to play a low F on the bass recorder and a high D and E on the alto recorder. That would make the Feathered Fipple reprise just a bit better. (and keep SWMBO from yelling at me).

Sometimes the Difficult Overshadows the Beautiful—This time NO-Way!

I often find myself so immersed in the “social service” mentality, which for me translates something like, there are so many terrible injustices in the world that I cannot totally remove myself and enjoy the beautiful things in life. I am constantly in that state in Moshi. The mountain is beautiful as is the land around, but the people are so poor and in need. Constant friction.

In the last two weeks, my lovely step-daughter Julia married a delightful young Charles in a wedding that was just perfect, and John went to Haiti to work with two clinics in helping to identify more resources for their patients. Oh my, what a clash of culture, poverty, wealth and need versus happiness.

My vow is that I will try to complain less, and my vow is to hold the joyful moments of Julia’s wedding, in their own right hope for the future.

Julia chose her wedding dress from the “Breast Cancer Research” organization that had traveled to North Carolina. It was lovely, perfect for her, and a testimonial to the work of this organization. Charles and Julia had worked tirelessly on their new (old) house and yard. With the help of friends, they had renovated kitchen and family room space, plumbed kitchen and bathroom space, repainted every wall, culled Craig’s list for furniture and plants, added a beautiful stone façade to the front walk, planted, weeded and watered. Charles, bless his heart and thank goodness he has a strong one, crawled under the house with those horrible hoppy cricket spiders to drag the new plumbing pipes to their new locations. Yet both smiled as each project finished. In the middle of all this, they picked fruit everywhere including the mountain house where apples, raspberries, blueberries and cherries produced a plethora of fruit this year. And they canned it all and made special little gifts of jam for each person who attended the wedding. Each had a little note attached.

All our family but Nana and Jim made it, and we really missed them. It was heroic work for all to make it from Rochester, Ontario (NY), Houston, NYC, Potomac, and Providence in time. Some funny highlights of the wedding were when KJ walked down the sidewalk and put the ring pillow over his head so that he couldn’t be seen and John showing James and Alex his expertise at tapping the keg and having it blow up all over him and his suit. Then there was the very touching proud father dancing with his daughter and randomly the music for the dance was John’s dad’s favorite song, “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”. The emotion of that moment reduced many who knew the story of the song to tears.

There were certain people who had arrived from out of town who were begging for a trip to the Q-shack, and low and behold, it was Q-shack BBQ served for dinner! Pies, Pies, Pies, and the surprise wedding cake baked by big sister Maya and her husband.

Friends were made and solidified, and this wedding brought them together. What a cherished time.

As for Haiti, we all need to remember that there is acute suffering there. Little has been done to rebuild because of the politics of the country, and suffering continues. John reports that more than 1.5 million people live in tents, including one of the physicians and his family at the Family Health Ministries program in Leogane.


Deforestation, homes in rubble, streets in rubble, people not paid for over 3 months, not enough food, medicines, work….all recipes for disaster, yet these amazing people keep working and keep making it all work. How do they do it? I don’t know!

So, I am going to keep the wedding in my heart and mind, and think of all the possibilities that can come from loving, gentle relationships. And all the good that comes when people love one another. Sometimes these memories make us stronger when it comes to the “social service mode”, and makes that work much easier to do, and to keep doing.